That the reeders of PUNCHINELLO may understand how the season is openin'
heer, let an old Stateman, who has served his country for 4 years as
Gustise of the Peece, consine his thoughts and observashuns to paper.
The season is openin' rather encouragin'.
The only openin' I know of that can beat it, was openin' clams at a
clam-bake down at Coney Iland.
With Hotel proprieters heer it is a good deal like eatin' clams.
When a person has lickt out the meet of a clam he throws the shell away.
So it is with the a-4-sed Hotel Keeper. When he licks all the sweet meet
out of his border's calf-skin pocket-book, he has no further use for the
empty shell, and consekently chucks him out of the winder as lively as
Wall street hussles out a lame duck.
The biggest houses heer are the Congris and Union.
These institushins are to _terry fermer_, what NOER'S Ark and the grate
Eastern was to commerce.
These taverns, bein' mammoth, perserve their mammothness by chargin'
mammoth bord bills. Ten cents a breth and fifteen cents a sneeze, any
ordinary member of Congress can stand; but when a wooden tooth-pick
costs you Twenty-five cents, and a cleen napkin half a dollar, a visitor
size for an app'intment as Revenoo Officer in a good fat whiskey
district.
There is quite a heep of people at Congress haul.
This bildin' is surrounded by piazas, where the fare sects slam out,
araid in gushin' apparel and stoopin' and tremblin' under their lode of
false hair, like an Irishman under a hod full of bricks.
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