Ah me, those dark green curtains with the overcoat buttons on them
hide many a distressful spectacle from the traveling public!
If a fat man undertakes to reduce nobody sympathizes with him. A
thin man trying to fatten up so he won't fall all the way through
his trousers when he draws 'em on in the morning is an object of
sympathy and of admiration, and people come from miles round and
give him advice about how to do it. But suppose a fat man wants
to train down to a point where, when he goes into a telephone
booth and says "Ninety-four Broad," the spectators will know he
is trying to get a number and not telling his tailor what his
waist measure is.
Is he greeted with sympathetic understanding? He is not. He is
greeted with derision and people stand round and gloat at him. The
authorities recommend health exercises, but health exercises are
almost invariably undignified in effect and wearing besides. Who
wants to greet the dewy morn by lying flat on his back and lifting
his feet fifty times? What kind of a way is that to greet the dewy
morn anyhow? And bending over with the knees stiff and touching
the tips of the toes with the tips of the fingers--that's no
employment for a grown man with a family to support and a position
to maintain in society.
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