Men and women in London stand for certain
talents, and are valued often very highly for them, but they are
valued merely as representing these talents. Now, if I had a talent,
I should not be satisfied with admiration or respect because of it.
No matter what admiration, or respect, or even enthusiasm I might
evoke, even if I were told that my services had been immense and that
life had been changed through my instrumentality, I should feel the
lack of quiet, personal affection, and that, I believe, is not common
in London. If I were famous, I would sacrifice all the adoration of
the world for the love of a brother--if I had one--or a sister, who
perhaps had never heard what it was which had made me renowned.'
'Certainly,' said Madge, laughing, 'for the love of SUCH a sister.
But, Mr Palmer, I like London. I like the people, just the people,
although I do not know a soul, and not a soul cares a brass farthing
about me. I am not half so stupid in London as in the country. I
never have a thought of my own down here. How should I? But in
London there is plenty of talk about all kinds of things, and I find
I too have something in me. It is true, as Clara says, that nobody
is anything particular to anybody, but that to me is rather pleasant.
I do not want too much of profound and eternal attachments. They are
rather a burden. They involve profound and eternal attachment on my
part; and I have always to be at my best; such watchfulness and such
jealousy! I prefer a dressing-gown and slippers and bonds which are
not so tight.
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