This seems to have been the experience of my
dear Mary. She had a strong presentiment of death being near. She said
that she would never have a house in this country. Taking it to be
despondency alone, I only joked, and now my heart smites me that I did
not talk seriously on that and many things besides.
"31_st May_, 1862.--The loss of my ever dear Mary lies like a heavy
weight on my heart. In our intercourse in private there was more than
what would be thought by some a decorous amount of merriment and play. I
said to her a few days before her fatal illness: 'We old bodies ought
now to be more sober, and not play so much.' 'Oh, no,' said she,' you
must always be as playful as you have always been; I would not like you
to be as grave as some folks I have seen.' This, when I know her prayer
was that she might be spared to be a help and comfort to me in my great
work, led me to feel what I have always believed to be the true way, to
let the head grow wise, but keep the heart always young and playful. She
was ready and anxious to work, but has been called away to serve God in
a higher sphere.
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